Human Zoo – 100 Word Story (from 400 Writing Prompts)

If you fell down a rabbit hole,what do you think you’d find?

Years ago, my mom asked me to go to the park with my sister. The park wasn’t far from our house, so my sister and I rode our bikes over and played hide and seek. I looked for somewhere to hide and saw a big tree with roots that I could crawl under. I crawled and crawled, until…I fell into darkness and landed on cold floor. I was in a cage with strange-looking beings staring at me. They had green skin and black eyes. I couldn’t understand their words. They watched me like I was an animal in a zoo.

photo credit: iStock by Getty Images

 

Tinder the Musical

I’ll gladly say it: I hate Tinder. I hate online dating in general, but I really hate Tinder. Major kudos to the lucky ducks who have successfully found love in the internet cesspool of left and right swiping because I tend to find more creeps and disgusting vulgarities than actual guys interested in something substantial. I rarely look at Tinder these days and when I do, I usually regret it. Today was one of those days.

I remembered a conversation I had with my friend Sarah. When I went to Chicago last year, she was the one who showed me around town. One of the times she was visiting home in good ol’ Springfield, we were at the local donut shop and we thought about how funny it would be to write a musical about Tinder. After checking my Tinder today and being thoroughly disappointed, I made this:

Still reading: 11/22/63 by Stephen King
Almost finished reading: Attempting Normal by Marc Maron (I recommend it in audiobook form)

Blog Challenge: 642 Tiny Things to [blog] about – Prompt 48

In the United States, the Department of Transportation is in charge of time zones. You feel a new time zone should be created. Where is it, and what would it be called?

To make this more interesting, I’ve made the central character a girl in her late teens, early twenties. Think Reese Witherspoon from “Legally Blonde.”

To Who It May Concern,

My name is Leslie Middleton and I’m a part of the Delta Sigma Delta Chi sorority at Missouri State University in St. Louis. I’m writing to you today with a proposal. I would like the United State of the USA to have one more timezone. It would be called “Party Time” and every day it would be allow more daylight, irregardless if it’s Daylight Savings Time. The time zone would be rove throughout the country around sunset. It would actually reverse the sun for a few more hours. This purpose would be solely for partying and offering the perfect light for taking selfies with friends. I think that offering this would literaly raise moral as a nation.

Think it over and text me on Kik, k?

Kthnxbai

Leslie

Blog Challenge: 642 Tiny Things to [blog] about – Prompt 47

Well hello again, it’s a been a minute.

Write a headline for the day after the world ends.

Because if you’re going to retroactively chastise those who somehow survive the apocalypse, soften the blow by saying “goofed” instead “fucked.”

Courtesy of The Newspaper Clipping Generator

You’re launching a sound recording of life on Earth into outer space to act as a emissary for the human race. Name the five specific sounds you will record.

1. A bird chirping
2. A baby’s laugh
3. An analog clock’s hands ticking
4. The waves of the ocean
5. A toilet flushing

Convey the third sound in detail. Don’t bother using words.

Tick, tick, tick, tick. (this is onomatopoeia)

Your recording may include a short inscription on it, the only text that will accompany these Earth sounds. There is space for only six words.

Our life as we know it.

Currently Listening To: Angel Haze – Back To The Woods (entire album on Soundcloud)

I’ve been an Angel Haze fan for a few years now and her music never ceases to impress me. Her newest album, Back To The Woods, is spectacular. I highly recommend it.

Speaking of woods, here’s a moment of nostalgia for the beautiful green trees at Roaring River State Park.

Blog Challenge: 642 Tiny Things to [blog] about – Prompt 46

What is at the top of your list of things you want to do before you die?

As incredibly nerdy as it sounds, I would really like to do one of those ancestral DNA tests and locate the places my ancestors came. Some of it would be confirmation of places I already knew (Czech, Irish, Swedish, German), but it would be cool to discover more of my origin. Genealogy has always been a thing that heavily interested me.

The words on your tombstone

“Guys, I was supposed to be cremated.”

Back in June, I took my 35mm camera with me to Roaring River State Park in Cassville, Missouri. Seeing this picture of the serene and calm spring water makes my heart feel so full.

Currently thinking about: Springfield Roller Girls. I’ll be attending my second roller derby bout at 6pm on Saturday. So stoked! Hands down, it’s my favorite sport to watch.

Comic Quote

I might not agree with myself in a year.

– Aisha Tyler

Comic Quote

Being a waitress, being a comic, and also listening to Amy Poehler’s Yes Please on Audible, I found I was able to relate to this quote:

“How a person treats their waitress is a great indication of their character.” – Amy Poehler

This clipart has Past Me’s hair color and length on Current Me’s head. Cool.

“And now for something completely different…”

A man with six noses!

Not really, just a weird animation of a bee that I made using MS Paint.

It’s only one loop, so make the most of it.

Blog Challenge: 642 Tiny Things to [blog] about – Prompt 41

Tweet from a dead famous person:

Benjamin Franklin
BeFrank1706: Got my face on the hundo. Didn’t even have to become pres. #winning #murrica #justkidding #france #letsgoflyakite #iinventedbifocals

Anna Nicole Smith
ASmi_Nikky: It’s not until after you die that you learn how many people had gambled death pools on you. #truthbomb

Jack Lemmon
SourWedgieJohnny: Filming “Some Like It Hot” is what made me a feminist man. When it comes to understanding women, you could say I walked in their shoes.

“Goodnight Sugar!” Photo cred: http://theredlist.com/media/database/muses/icon/cinematic_men/1960/jack-lemmon/039-jack-lemmon-theredlist.jpg

Blog Challenge: 642 Tiny Things to [blog] about – Prompt 39 (for real this time!)

Beefsteak tomatoes or cherry tomatoes? Why?

Cherry, hands down. I love the taste and sweetness. I can eat them by themselves.

This is actually a picture of a Roma tomato.

Describe your style in two words.

Independence Day. (‘Murica)

A billionaire is creating a new country on a Pacific island. There is a contest to name it. What is your entry?

Getaway. Think about it. It’d be great for tourism!

I hope everyone had a wonderful and safe Independence Day!